mutual understandings
by nagito
Summary: It all started with a train-ride home. / A collection of KomaHina drabbles set in a high school AU without any murders or bears. Spoiler-free.
1. oukashou

**-01. oukashou-**

* * *

Their knees were touching, the tips of their fingers brushing against each other. Komaeda couldn't help but feel nervous as Hinata dozed off, his head finally coming down to rest on his shoulder. Their train stop was fast approaching. 3 or 4 more stations? That wasn't nearly enough time, he thought.

He acknowledged just how selfish it was of him, though. He had to wake Hinata up sooner or later... and if he didn't he'd probably get scolded. But that didn't stop him from deliberately ignoring the announcement as the train arrived at where they were supposed to get off.

* * *

_Surprisingly managed to keep it at actual drabble length whoa. Probably will be longer the next few chapters haha_


	2. feelings

-**02. feelings**-

* * *

Hinata was angry.

Somehow the two of them ended up riding the train until the very end of the line, and Komaeda reasoned out that _Hinata-kun was sleeping_ so he didn't want to wake him up. It kind of ticked Hinata off as all the points started to connect in his mind. Was is because Komaeda thought that he wasn't 'worthy' again? Maybe. It could've been anything, but much to Hinata's dismay that was the first thing to pop up in his mind.

He quickly dismissed the thought; reasoning to himself that assuming Komaeda would act this way because of that same reason all the time wouldn't be very friend-like on his part. And, well, he wanted to believe that it wasn't fucking true.

He only hoped that Komaeda didn't notice the blush on his cheeks when he realized that he had been leaning on his shoulder the entire time, but knowing him he probably had the courtesy not to mention it when he was already angry. Otherwise, he'd have said something about it by now.

Hinata sighed as they headed for the other platform; hand firmly gripping Komaeda's arm. It wasn't like he was going to be angry forever. He was just a little frustrated that the time they could've spent together somewhere out of the station was spent on him sleeping, but that wasn't necessarily a bad thing. It was kind of sweet that Komaeda didn't want to wake him up and all and let him sleep.

Soon enough, all signs of anger went away as they boarded the train. Hinata insisted that they remain standing (he didn't want to fall asleep again), and as the train began to move his hand slowly shifted from Komaeda's arm to lace their fingers together instead. He smiled, reassuring Komaeda that no, he wasn't angry anymore and that they could stop by that one fast food place before they went their separate ways for the day.

His heart probably won't leave him alone anytime soon, though. No matter how much he'd try to convince himself that he's calmed down.

* * *

_The 5cm per second soundtrack is making me emotional today_


	3. all all apologies pt 1

-**03. all all apologies pt. 1**-

* * *

That night Hinata couldn't help but think about that train ride back home. Their time together as soon as they got off of the train (in the right station this time) went by quickly, and though his watch said that they were together in that fast food joint for almost an hour it felt much shorter than that. He thought back to how they held hands, to how cold Komaeda's hand seemed to be in comparison to his... it was almost like none of it even happened.

As soon as he made it to his room, he dropped his bag to its designated spot and lied down on his bed. His eyes focused on the ceiling, realizing that surely by now Komaeda's gotten the message... right? The message that he had wanted to be..._ err.._. something more than friends with him. He's mentioned it a couple of times too. How he had fallen this hard for him. It was the same for Komaeda, wasn't it? He's spoken a few _I love you more than anything, Hinata-kun_s before (okay, maybe more than a few), so it wouldn't be a stretch to say that Komaeda was experiencing something similar, at least. It felt like the two of them were in this weird mutual relationship where they acknowledged each other's feelings but never really acted on it except for the few times they did all these little things couples would do, and it never really went beyond hand holding an sleeping on each other's shoulders.

_Huh..._

It wasn't really all that bad, anyway. Maybe he was pushing it a little too much. There wasn't a guarantee that anything more than what the two of them already had would work out, anyway... and it didn't seem like a good idea to risk it. Not at this point... Maybe.

With those thoughts continuing to haunt him even in his sleep, Hinata went to bed that night feeling conflicted.


	4. all all apologies pt 2

**-04. all all apologies pt. 2-**

* * *

Komaeda, however, couldn't sleep.

He was filled with so many emotions that he just remained restless throughout the night. He continued to think back on how _Hinata-kun was sleeping on his shoulder_, or how _Hinata-kun held his hand_ as the got off the train at the correct station.

At the very back of his mind, he thought that none of this could've been real. Maybe he really was as insane as his classmates made him out to be, but he learned to stop caring about that years ago. He could always hold on to the hope that perhaps all of it was for real, and that in itself was enough for him.

(If it actually was real then he could only wonder what kind of bad luck he could have possibly ran into to have this happen at all.)

As the day's memories continued to play over and over in his head, Komaeda considered the possibility of solidifying his relationship with Hinata once and for all. He considered asking Hinata out on a serious date, considered buying him presents on valentine's day, _but all of that's beyond my reach_, he told himself. He didn't have the right to go beyond the boundaries the two of them had already set up.

And that was fine.

He was happy with how things were. He was lucky to even be able to hold hands with Hinata at all, so he's already accepted how there was no way he could make the first move unless Hinata actually asks him to.

With his eyes fixated on the ceiling, Komaeda continued to reminisce. Finally falling asleep as the sun started to rise.


End file.
